Friday, February 24, 2012

Write On Edge: Conflict and Violence Challenge

For this week's WOE prompt, in Red Writing Hood   asks us to throw a little conflict at our characters in the name of strong plot development in 300 words or less.



Conflict, as defined by Dictionary.com, is to come to a collision or disagreement.While physical violence might be the most obvious form of conflict, internal struggles allow for more diverse or complex characters.



I offer the following in response: Loyalty Challenged



“You've been gone too long,” Gina growled. “I ain’t a snitch Eddie.”

His eyes, once the focus of her childhood crush, were shockingly unfeeling like the FBI badge attached to his belt. “We’re taking Jimmy down. You don’t want to be there when we do,” he warned.

“And where’d jya think I’d wanna go?” she snorted, crossing her arms. Ed, Jimmy, Joe, they were all close back in school, terrorizing the neighborhood with spray-paint cans and petty shoplifting. Drifting apart after graduation, Jimmy took up the family business while Eddie became a fed.  “He's good to me. Jimmy paid the doctors when Momma got sick.”

Eddie rubbed his brow. “So he saved your mother. His one good deed for the century.”

Simmering rage transformed her lungs to lead and burned her cheeks, “Nice, Eddie, good to know you can put the past behind jya. Some of us, we ain’t that lucky, or didjya forget Joey?”

She hit a nerve. Eddie’s features shifted grotesquely in the ill-lit alleyway. He advanced aggressively towards her, backing her against the cinder-block wall. “I forgot nothing,” he barked. “Why the hell do you think I joined the FBI? Look me in the eye and tell me Jimmy didn’t have anything to do with Joey’s death.”

She snapped, “That cop clipped him and you know it.”

“Not what forensics reports.” he countered venomously. “I know you lied about that night. Who are you protecting if not Jimmy?”

Gina refused to make eye contact, her gut churning. “Look, Eddie, we done here? I gotta go wash my hair.”

He spun her about, forcing her face into the wall. Handcuffs pinched her wrists painfully as they locked into place. “You’re under arrest.”

“What for?” she hissed defiantly.

“I’ll think of something.” 


16 comments:

  1. The tension's rolling in that alleyway.


    Very Noir. :)

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    1. Thanks! The word limit was a struggle for me today. I'm glad I was able to make it work.

      Thanks for dropping me the line!

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  2. had me on the edge of my seat. wonderfully done!

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    1. Thanks for stopping by! I'm thrilled you enjoyed your stay!

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  3. Excellent use of dialogue!

    Great tension and conflict.

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    1. Thank you for visiting and for sharing your thoughts!

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  4. Definately intriguing. Left me looking for more of the back story.

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    1. I should perhaps have said these were new characters for me. I haven't mapped out the story beyond this little exchange. I have some ideas though so we may see more of them later on down the road.

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I appreciate you dropping by!

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  5. I'd love to hear more about these characters and their story. Well told! That last line was a winner!

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    1. Thanks! I keep all of my characters so I'm sure I'll see them again. That last line was fun. I wanted to show his frustration at her lack of cooperation. Thanks again for stopping by and sharing your thoughts!

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  6. very good - I like how much back-story you fit in, without giving too much away. It isn't just anger in the moment, it's a long-running issue.

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    1. Thanks! I'm glad I was able to pull off that extra layer of emotion. Thank you for stopping by and sharing your thoughts!

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  7. I love the back-and-forth here. The dialogue really clips along.

    And that last line? Fabulous.

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    1. Thank you for the wonderful feedback! I really appreciate you stopping by and sharing your thoughts!

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  8. Yow! I could hear the accents. I like that there's action and conflict here .... with drama.

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    1. Ooh thanks! I'm so glad I was able to carry this off. I'm glad you stopped by. Thanks for the feedback!

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